Ladies and gentleman, I am not a qualified film reviewer. I know that I like and what gives me the icks. I have the critical mind of yogurt. Thankfully, I have found the perfect twosome to hash out the strength and weaknesses of movies, the 1980s and 2000's versions of a bounty hunter from Empire Strikes Back.
Folks, this is Bossk Office.
Chipper Bossk: Green Lantern.
Surly Bossk: Green Lantern.
Chipper Bossk: I can't believe they made a Green Lantern movie.There were scenes during the film that were overwhelmed by my shock that I was watching a Green Lantern film. They couldn't compete with my astonishment.
Surly Bossk: Among other things. Your glee --
Chipper Bossk: I didn't say I had glee.
Surly Bossk: Your glee couldn't whitewash an awkward collage of cliche and confusion of audience. What could have been a decent mainstream film, a fun time for the family, is a stiff kids movie. Because the kids will ignore the formula and marvel at the visuals.
Chipper Bossk: The potential is there.
Surly Bossk: And the greatest sin this movie commits is adhering so closely to the comics that the obvious goofiness of the source material becomes blatant. The constructs our hero builds to fight the bad guys are so needlessly complex that he seems apathetic to the danger to others around him.
Chipper Bossk: I did like the cast. They seemed invested in it.
Surly Bossk: I blame the filmmakers. Here's an example: In order to get to the eye-popping visuals early, they give us a narration of the origin of the Lanterns. This includes the origin of the man bad guy. The movie gives us the villain's origin again halfway through. But because we get the skinny on the Lanterns upfront, the hero has to play catch-up to the audience, and his mind-blowing discoveries are old-hat to us.
Chipper Bossk: The effects are nice. The money is all on the screen.
Surly Bossk: Yeah, but they have no emotional wallop because the story has no surprises. Actually, scratch that. The film does surprise me by introducing a likable nephew for the hero, a young kid who is never seen after our hero emerges despite the easy home run of seeing them enjoy his new powers. How could they miss that?
Chipper Bossk: Bet that's on the DVD.
Surly Bossk: Which will come to stores much quicker than they'd like because this film ain't long for theaters.
Chipper Bossk: The best thing that can be said here is that the film is disappointing for being exactly the kind of comic book movie that the best comic book movies rise above. We're accustomed to more from our comic movies, and that's a heartening progression for us comic fans.
Folks, this is Bossk Office.
Surly Bossk: Green Lantern. Chipper Bossk: I can't believe they made a Green Lantern movie.There were scenes during the film that were overwhelmed by my shock that I was watching a Green Lantern film. They couldn't compete with my astonishment.Surly Bossk: Among other things. Your glee -- Chipper Bossk: I didn't say I had glee.Surly Bossk: Your glee couldn't whitewash an awkward collage of cliche and confusion of audience. What could have been a decent mainstream film, a fun time for the family, is a stiff kids movie. Because the kids will ignore the formula and marvel at the visuals. Chipper Bossk: The potential is there. Surly Bossk: And the greatest sin this movie commits is adhering so closely to the comics that the obvious goofiness of the source material becomes blatant. The constructs our hero builds to fight the bad guys are so needlessly complex that he seems apathetic to the danger to others around him. Chipper Bossk: I did like the cast. They seemed invested in it.Surly Bossk: I blame the filmmakers. Here's an example: In order to get to the eye-popping visuals early, they give us a narration of the origin of the Lanterns. This includes the origin of the man bad guy. The movie gives us the villain's origin again halfway through. But because we get the skinny on the Lanterns upfront, the hero has to play catch-up to the audience, and his mind-blowing discoveries are old-hat to us. Chipper Bossk: The effects are nice. The money is all on the screen. Surly Bossk: Yeah, but they have no emotional wallop because the story has no surprises. Actually, scratch that. The film does surprise me by introducing a likable nephew for the hero, a young kid who is never seen after our hero emerges despite the easy home run of seeing them enjoy his new powers. How could they miss that? Chipper Bossk: Bet that's on the DVD.Surly Bossk: Which will come to stores much quicker than they'd like because this film ain't long for theaters. Chipper Bossk: The best thing that can be said here is that the film is disappointing for being exactly the kind of comic book movie that the best comic book movies rise above. We're accustomed to more from our comic movies, and that's a heartening progression for us comic fans. 
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